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Tardiness is no big deal if you’re the one who is late. But for the party waiting for you, it can be the straw that finally breaks the camel’s back.

No, this post is not going to convince you on the virtues of being punctual. Those of us who’ve waited enough know that you cannot really help it.

This post is about taking the power back for those who waited and how to one-up on you to make the wait a welcomed episode.

I am a punctual person. And for some reason, I’ve learnt to expect others to be punctual too. And when they’re not, I’d react in various degrees of response:

• Make a mountain out of it and proceed to spoil the rest of the day
• Contemplate revenge by being late on the next meeting
• Let the frustration limit whatever good feelings I might have
• Keep a straight face

I realize I’m getting punished twice: once for the waiting part and then once more for the above.

And all this for a situation that is really outside of my control. When I let an external situation get to me, I lose my own power.

I need to see tardiness in a new light so that when it happens, I will not be affected.

1. When someone is late, it does not mean you are less important. It’s only human to want to put oneself in the center of focus, for better or for worse. How many times do we end up needlessly hurt because we keep putting our egos on the line? Read my lips: it’s not always about you. Many times, it’s just that they have to finish that thing they’ve started before meeting you; you’re not less because you have to wait.
2. You cannot compare your time against their time, you can only make the best out of yours - I’ve heard this from a course: “being late is rude because it says my time is more important than your time.” This is wrong. You cannot compare times because your cannot give or receive it. If you truly value your time, think about how you’re spending it while you’re waiting. For me, I can listen to an educational podcast on my Shuffle, read a good book, or whip out my notepad and write a short journal. Be prepared to wait.
3. Revenge is futile and is likely to bite you back - what do you do to the person who’s late? We usually seek revenge in the form of getting them to pay for the next meal or giving them a stern warning. Does that really even things out? She’s late, you’re pissed, you piss her back, and now you’re both pissed. It’s a vicious cycle. Instead of punishment, try the opposite - thank the person for giving you some time-off to do this important thing that you did while waiting. So, she’s late, you create some value, you thank her, she’s relieved, you’re off to a nice evening.

How do you react to your tardy friends? Do you have any other tips to share?